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How to make friends after college – many people believe that it is impossible to make friends after college, especially if you are moving to a new city where you do not know anyone. But while it may be harder to make friends in adulthood, it’s possible.
To show you as much as possible, this article will look at different ways to make friends after college. Some of these methods may be familiar to you, but I’m sure some you haven’t considered.
Why do people find it difficult to make friends after college or stay in touch?
After graduation, you will most likely have a job that takes 8-10 hours of your day (including travel time). And after a busy day, going out to socialize is the last thing many people want to do.
In addition, after graduating from college, people begin to marry or become more involved in serious relationships. They take time on their own, and then free time almost disappears when people have children. Of course, this is a generalization, but both of them contribute to the general employment of people. Given all this, it can be harder to find time to communicate with existing friends, let alone meet new people.
Why do adult people find it difficult to make new friends?
For some reason, it always seems that the older you get, the harder it is to make new friends. And it’s not just that it’s getting harder to find time – it seems that everyone is a little less interested in communicating with new people as we get older. It is as if we have been formed for 20 or so years, which allows us to be pliable and easy-going (and therefore quite friendly), and then BAM – we are firm and steadfast. Suddenly it becomes difficult to see that other people are worth your time. In college, you’ve already done all the “dating of every stranger,” and you don’t want to try that anymore.
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How difficult is it to make friends after college?
For people who want to make new friends – for example, after moving to a new city, changing jobs, or just leaving old friends – this can be especially difficult. Everyone is so busy, and we are less likely to have three things that sociologists consider necessary to make close friends: intimacy; repeated, unplanned interactions; and an environment where people oppress and trust each other (such as college).
How to make friends after college
Expand the circle of communication you already have
After you move out of college, finding a group of great friends becomes quite difficult. If you are looking for ways to expand your circle of friends, try meeting friends. Yes, it can mean participating when your friend invites you to the job they talked about or getting to a bar when their roommates come to town, but you can make new friends.
Welcome digital friendship
Friendship on the Internet is sometimes despised, but in the 21st century, digital friendship must be perfectly normal. We are more connected than ever before, which means that our pool of potential friends has expanded exponentially over the last few generations.
Whether it’s finding a Facebook group for useful memes, starting conversations on your favorite sub-band, increasing subscribers as Twitch streamers, interacting with people by creating your own blog, or something else, technology can be a powerful tool for creating new friendships.
Take the initiative.
Waiting for someone to introduce themselves is a great way to stay in touch. It turned out that humans are quite chubby creatures. But you know your dad always talked about chubby creatures; they are more afraid of you than you are of them.
So take the lead. Always assume that if you want friends, you have to make them. Come and introduce yourself. Yes, it is very inconvenient. Yes, it’s very scary… if that’s what’s holding you back, you may not like my next piece of advice.
Make friends with your neighbours
Whether you’re moving through the city to get closer to work, returning home with your parents, or to another country to find a great job, it’s a good idea to make friends with your neighbors.
Now you don’t have to be friends with your neighbours, but having a good relationship with them can be helpful if you’re traveling out of town and need someone to deliver mail, take care of your pet, or greet someone in the afternoon when taking the mail.
If you are moving to a residential area or an area where there are people about your age, it can also be a good opportunity to find friends with whom you can hang out and get closer.
Joining an organization is one of the best ways to build new relationships that can grow into friendships. The benefits are many. First, having a common goal or interest makes the conversation much easier. This does not mean that you should only discuss what you belong to (this may become strange after a while). But it’s much easier than starting from scratch with a stranger.
In addition, organizations provide a structure and activities that can eliminate significant pressure on ongoing communication. This is especially true if you are shy by nature and you are uncomfortable having long conversations with strangers.
Find some activities after work.
Although after work you may be tempted to go home to your cats and have a glass of wine, looking for social activities that you can do in your spare time is a great way to express yourself. Some of the activities you can try are cooking or exercising. There will definitely be other people in your class, and if you are in class together, you will probably be able to find something in common.
Don’t miss social events.
While the prospect of talking to a bunch of strangers or people you don’t know very well may seem daunting, you’ll probably be glad you left. Especially if you are looking for new friends, attending social events is a great way to meet new people or strengthen friendships with people you didn’t know before.
Community events can be burdensome and overly stimulating for some people, but if you are one of those people who like them, you can be included in regular meetings, such as a poker night or weekly after work.
What are the kinds of places to make new friends after college?
You will probably spend more than 40 hours with the same people five days a week. Use these hours! Make new friends with your colleagues. This will not only improve your work environment but also simplify your personal life – it’s so convenient to have a single-window to have fun and do things, isn’t it?
If you don’t hate everyone in your high school, you can find friends in your meetings. They are a great place to socialize with people who live near you, or people you liked in high school but never had the opportunity to truly communicate with.
You don’t have to wait for big five or 10-year meetings – some schools have regional alumni meetings every year. And since you have a base of your most awkward years to draw from, conversations will never be boring.
Training is a great way to make new friends. Start writing down who else is coming at about the same time as you. Although I do not recommend hovering over their station and waiting for a good time to talk, I think that approaching them and starting a conversation when they are resting is not too far outside the left field. This way, you get a friend from the gym and a friend at the same time.
It doesn’t have to be big concerts in big halls or festivals. I’m talking about a small coffee shop that is intimate enough to sit next to. You already have a discovery – you both like any music that is performed. Just start the conversation and go. It’s less scary than it sounds, I swear.
Pay attention to who gets the coffee at about the same time as you. Since you probably go there every weekday, it is likely that the same people will be there every day. Look? You already have something in common!
Suburban train or bus
As in the gym and coffee shops, a morning trip to work can be a great start to creating an atmosphere of friendship. If you live in a big city and use public transport, you will often see the same people. If they carry a book you like, why not use it as an opener? You may make both of your trips easier.
Recreational Sports League
After work/weekend sports teams are mostly appointed by friends. You will learn to love your teammates, and your good times are likely to last long after the last goal (or other).
Does life get boring after college?
When you graduate from college, things change. Once the excitement of starting a new job or moving to a new city fades, you can get stuck in the same routine. You go to work, go home, cook dinner, watch TV, and repeat. If you are not careful, your life can become boring and monotonous. But it doesn’t have to be that way.
Is it okay to not have friends?
Lack of friends can be an unpleasant, discouraging condition, and can be a sign that you have weaknesses that you need to work on, but that doesn’t mean you’re completely broken. Many people had periods in their lives when they had no one to talk to. Your value is not only determined by the number of your friends. Many villains have large social circles. Many good people were lonely at one point.